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Golden Style Rules For Forty-Plus Dads

forty plus dads

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By the time you make it to your late 40s early 50s, there’s a lot you can raise a glass to as a man. You’ve achieved great things in your professional career and astonishing thing in your personal life too (such as the kids of yours). No matter what anyone says, or how easy those young and handsome Instadads, make it seem, the midway marker in a man’s life is never as bad as it seems. But there are things that need more attention than ever and your sense of style is one of the,

Don’t be one of those guys that lets his style slip to the wayside just because you’ve got everything you want in life. You’re only at the midway point. There is still loads you should want to do. There is still a way you should want to hold and present yourself as you enter the Silver Fox club, and this is your time to finesse all that.

Thankfully, the basics are all you really need to be a dapper dad. It’s things like wearing clothes that fit, avoiding double denim and only wearing sneakers that are made by a luxury brand, such as a Prada or Gucci, and ideally not in a vibrant colour.

Of course, there will be times of doubt. But when you stumble across one of these times, don’t panic. Instead, thinking WWCFD – What Would Colin Firth Do. And not just him, but Mark Strong, Clive Owen, and David Harewood, all of whom know how to dress with a certain suaveness, turning what so many perceive to be a negative (their age) and turning it into a timeless style.

And, with all that said and done, here some golden rules every middle-aged man needs to know, worship and follow:

  1. Block Out Your Colour

Don’t get us wrong. We’re not saying you should grab a black bin liner, march up to your bedroom, open your wardrobe and send every piece of colorful clothing into the forgotten abyss. No way. We’re just saying you need to be a bit more choosy with the colors you wear. Avoid all those bright colors you got away with as a twenty something and retire your time as a pastel wearer, and opt for more all-rounders. Tonal colors that can be worn with just about anything; the kind that can be pieced together or worn separately simply because their color compliments the others in your arsenal. Go for the classics too –camel, navy blue, maroon, navy blue, deep green and all those. It’s not about playing it safe, it’s about playing it suave.

  1. Make A Middle-Aged Statement

We know how tempting it is to walk into a Harley Davidson store, picking their mattes black bike and drive it through the window wearing a leather cut you picked up in charity store just to let yourself know you’re still awesome. But you don’t need to go to these lengths. Instead, make a statement by investing in those wardrobe pieces you’ve always craved but never been able to justify. It could be the sort of Belstaff biker jacket you’d be too worried about wearing on a bike, or a pair of Tom Ford brogues complete with stylish compression socks, a suit tailored to your measurements on Savile Row, or a leather-back briefcase made by an Italian designer you can’t quite pronounce. Yes, they are expensive enough to make your eyes bulge, your bank manager check your sanity and your wife to scrunch up her brow, but they’ll last forever and, if you pick the right colors, be worn more than you ever thought possible.

  1. Your Days Of Branding Are Over

If you’re wearing anything whereby the color is lost in the huge branding, you’re getting it all wrong. Superdry, Calvin Klein, Polo Ralph Lauren – anything brash whatsoever – and you’re simply telling the world you’re in a full-blown midlife crisis. You’re at an age where you’ve made it, where you don’t need to impress anyone with your spending habits or the size of your wallet. It will simply work against you. So, phase out any in-your-face designer nods and replace them with very subtle accessories that will catch people’s eye and have you recognized for your style more than anything else. A fancy watch, a glinting signet ring, a sterling silver tie pin, an Aspinals of London wallet, beautiful Oxfords or even a solid metal bangle. Little things like this will up your style game more than any branded clothing.

  1. Suits The Shape Of You

When you were young, foolish and hip enough to be the godfather of your moped gang, you were able to rock drainpipe suits, slim lapels and even slimmer ties (you could even get away with that dodgy haircut). But those days are done, so if you still have any of these in your wardrobe, get rid of them along with any hopes this fashion will come back around. Chances are it might. But you won’t be of an age to rock it well. Instead, you need to swap them for a more traditional and, dare we say, mature shape. That could mean a double-breasted number if you fancy, but it could just mean a two-button, thick-lapelled piece too.

  1. Confidence Is Your Secret Weapon

A lot of men panic when they reach forty and then have a mild stroke when they hit the halfway to a hundred mark. Don’t. You’ve got experience on your side. You know what you want, who you are, what looks good on you and what makes you tick. That’s not to say you’ve had it easy or know everything. Not at all. But whether you have a wife and kids or you’re newly single, everything they say about men being fine wines that getting better and better with age is absolutely spot on. Own it. Own your age. Own your laughter lines, rock that silvery hair and take advantage of your advantages. That confidence will be the best thing you ever wore. Fact.

6 Invest In Some Comfortable Briefs Too

Does the elastic on your briefs resemble a worn out rubber band? Do you have two pairs of boxer shorts that are not quite long enough for your legs? Is one leg hole bigger than the other? If so, then it is time to invest in some new undergarments like Zorbies. By wearing only the most comfortable briefs, you’ll feel much better for much longer on most days. Men regularly underestimate the incredible difference comfortable briefs can make.

Four Words Per Picture 2: At-Home Dad Convention

My first Four Words Per Picture post was just over a month ago. Keeping the words short and pictures aplenty seemed to work last time, so here’s hoping for a good round two!

After going through my phone, and social media pages, I collected many pics of my weekend at the At-Home Dads Convention, so kick back and enjoy!

Workout with another fitdad.

RC and Jesse Post workout

Dinner at The Pit.

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Raleigh beer tour fun.

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Our morning stair run.

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Hey, that means me!

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Meet and greet speakers.

Protein salad in room.

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Cheers with Daddy Porter.

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Dads learn from dads.

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Local pulled pork lunch.

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My awesome hotel roommates!

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Interview with Dad Bros!

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NuttZo fuel to go.

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#DadWords from Oren Miller.

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Lots of new friends.

Baby wearing gone wrong.

 

Selfie with Josh Levs!

Britax car seat challenge.

Happy to be home.

Pardon the excessive use of pics from Instagram, but it’s just so much easier to pull from the ones already online.

The entire weekend was a blast, and I could share many more pics, but these are some of my favorites. It all went by so fast (cliche, I know) and look forward to seeing this great group of at-home dads again soon.

What My 1st At-Home Dads Convention Taught Me

Hey hey! I’m back from attending the 20th Annual At-Home Dads Convention and, wow, what a weekend! This was my first time to attend the spectacular event put on by the National At-Home Dad Network, but it’s definitely not my last.

My last post was about how I was leaving to attend the convention, and now I’m ready to sum it up as best as I can. There is a wave of emotion still building to tsunami-sized proportions inside of me, and putting into words is difficult. Kinda like when you know you’re in love, but in a straight, brotherly love kinda way.

I arrived Thursday afternoon and met up with the 2 of the dads I was sharing a room with. The other dad had a late flight that night, but he’s actually from Dallas and I had met him at a local Dallas Dads Group meet-up. I knew the dad from Dallas was a good guy from the little talking we did before, and thankfully the other guys were all good spirited as well.

As a matter of fact, I’ll just say it right now….Every. Single. Dad. Was. Awesome! Yeah, didn’t meet a one that put off a negative vibe, and even right after meeting them, I felt I could give them all a hug without second-guessing it. For some, I actually did give a hug. A bro-hug, of course.

Thursday night was just a laid-back gathering for those who arrived a day early and wanted to enjoy a few beers while meeting again or for the first time. Even though we never met face-to-face, I knew most of these guys from talking on Facebook almost 2 years and we recognized each other right off the bat. There was never a dull moment as we all mingled and enjoyed some good craft beer from Raleigh.

Seeing how well our group of dads got along and connected was refreshing to say the least. As a self-proclaimed introvert, I found it surprisingly easy to start a conversation and comfortably chat amongst a big or small group of other at-home dads. I’ve always heard great things, but actually experiencing it shone a new light on the powerful bonds created almost instantly.

Friday evening was when the event kicked off with a meet and greet in our hotel lobby. They recommended dressing business casual, so I had to dig out my old work clothes for the event. It was kind of nice dressing up (just a little) for a change. Food and drink were provided as well as plenty of memories and welcoming handshakes from more dads I’ve known online and ones I’ve never met.

Saturday morning kicked off the convention with a full day of speakers and breakout sessions covering topics like finding a good balance between work (yes, at-home dads “work” too) and family time, picky eaters, blogging, the decision about going back to work, entrepreneurship at home, and even one for dads with daughters. Yes, I attended the dads with daughters session, duh!

That evening we enjoyed a wonderful dinner provided by one of the sponsors, DinnerCall, with food and drinks at a hoppin rooftop bar. Again, all of the dads were extremely happy to talk to each other and swap stories, tips, and thoughts with one another.

Sunday was short but still powerful with more informative sessions on being a better dad as well as formal organization agenda items like voting for board members. Some key members were leaving this year and delivered powerful and emotional speeches to our group of 145 dads. If you think guys don’t or shouldn’t cry, you should see our group and I bet you’ll change your mind; maybe even well up a little yourself.

I might cover the events in more detail in future posts, but the main thing I want to share today is the biggest surprise I received from attending the convention. It has to do with me, how I responded to the weekend full of activities and never any downtime to be alone.

As an introvert, I tend to crave/need my alone time to clear my head and rest. It’s literally a major effort to go out sometimes and can be mentally exhausting. If you’re an introvert, you understand, if not, you think I’m ridiculous. To each their own. 😉

But this weekend, I learned something about myself; I was able to break free from my introvert ways and found myself enjoying the presence of others. Even with such a large group, from going out to a pub to all 145 at-home dads in the convention room, I was comfortable. I’m usually all antsy and looking for a way out when we go to a restaurant or something, but everyone just made things comforting.

I don’t know how else to say, but I enjoyed every single dad I met and they each offered helpful advice, a good laugh, or just a simple hug and handshake. All of which I never expected.

Maybe because we’re all in the same boat when it comes to staying at home with our little clones, but whatever it is, I crave more. That’s why I plan on attending the 21st Annual At-Home Dads Convention next year, and hope to see all 145 guys plus more!

I’ll have plenty of pictures to share from the weekend. Here’s a glimpse just to give you a taste of our at-home dad camaraderie.

However, while the convention did see me lose most of my introverted tendencies, it was not a permanent change.

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A fellow at-home dad friend caught me taking a chill pill of loneliness to text Kelley before going into our hotel room. I still prefer being home over going out much, but now I know I can better manage the situation. And who knows, maybe I’ll find a newer, more extrovert me along the way.

Are you more of an introvert or extrovert?

Ever find yourself feeling like the opposite of how you usually feel when going out around large crowds?