10 Tips for A New and Nervous Dad

04/17/2018 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

Becoming a new dad can be a dicey affair. Suddenly, everything stops revolving around you and the newborn suddenly becomes the center of attention. The world starts conniving against you and you kick into panic mode! The endless wails around the night, you suddenly lose interest in your favorite football matches and Jimmy you buddy seems to be having the time of his life with the newly found girl.

There are many things that come attached to the title daddy and topping the list is nervousness and panic. Things like changing diapers or even feeding the little prince or princess suddenly become a bother.

Well, daddy you are on the right flight, destination “cool and composed daddy.”

As a new dad, beginning a relationship with your child involves quitting your normal life and sacrificing more time for your family, cutting off extra expenditure, and in some instances changing friends just to mention but a few.

Although becoming a dad is one of the eventful periods you’ll ever experience in your life, its also compounded with a lot of emotions. The fact that you are going to have a huge impact on your lovely kid may leave you having sleepless nights, wondering what to do and where to start _ not to mention trying to please the society.

However, as a new baby sets foot into this world, he/she expects to be received with warm hands by both parents. You as the dad don’t want to be the canvas upon which your world paints a picture of a cruel world. For that reason, we’ve compiled a list of 10 tips that will help you go through this episode successfully.

Act like a grown-up

It would be extremely unpleasant and disturbing when you don’t take parenting seriously. Parenting isn’t easy and you may be tempted to result in drinking.

However, at this point, your family needs you at home for moral support and your presence alone means a lot to your wife and baby. If happiness is what you are looking for in drinking kids are an endless source of joy.

Going out for drinks isn’t necessarily bad, but overindulging and hiding your parenting emotions through it is unquestionably lackadaisical.

Talk to your baby more often

A recently published study stated that a baby emulates the characteristics of his parents. Talking to your child is one of the main factors that lead to them developing cognitive behaviors and communication.

Moreover, singing songs and narrating stories to them enhances your father-son bonding which has been shown to reduce constrained relationships once they grow up.

Involve yourself with the baby

From the onset, be present as the dad. Get involved in the daily care and upkeep of your baby creates a special bond hence reducing the nervousness. After all, you get to realize that bathing, changing diapers, dressing and playing with your cute baby is absolutely normal and doable.

Additionally, spending time with your baby gives the mother time to rest. More rest time for the mum means that they will have the energy to look after the baby once you are resting.

It’s ok to get help

It’s a blessing to have friends, family, and neighbors who really care about your welfare. They will purposely give gifts to show love and celebrate the life of your kid. Therefore, even if you are full of ego and pride it always good to accept any gift.

On occasions where you are struggling financially, you can always ask for help from close friends. Help may literally get your life going leaving you with little to worry about.

Don’t forget other relationships

Getting a baby doesn’t mean you abandon your other relationships. Getting back on your feet and returning to your role as a friend, team player at your job placement and more importantly as a devoted spouse is key.

Parenting shouldn’t feel like an eternal prison for you as the dad. Instead, it should be a complement to your already existing life. As the kid’s age progresses, the pressure eventually reduces and you eventually go back to your element.

Never have regrets

It’s absolutely normal to have negative thoughts but regrets shouldn’t be one of them. Kids are special gifts from God and should be embraced by all means.

Once you become a dad, the last thing you want to do is spend the rest of your life regretting. The only thing you should regret about is not having enough time with your family doubting yourself.

To avoid all the negative thought, engage and interact with positive friends who will always appreciate that you have become a father instead of blaming you for not showing up in the pub the day before.

Educate yourself

There’s no worse moment than lack of information, especially to new parents. As the saying goes “lack of information can only reward you with embarrassment” always be informed.

It’s during the moments when you don’t know what to do that nervousness kicks in and your mind switches to panic mode.

Bury your head in parenting magazines to equip yourself with information. They give you nuggets and golden parachutes to tackle almost every challenge. However, not all knowledge comes from books. Attending parenting seminars, talking to other dads, and asking help from close family members also helps. However, hanging out with your child is always the best blueprint for working your way up the parenthood ladder.

Protect yourself

Your new life as a new dad comes with new responsibilities. You surely don’t want your baby to suffer the effects of being raised by a single mother just because you got reckless and hurt yourself to the extent of being unable to support your partner.

Look out for yourself both physically and mentally. Hit the gym occasionally and tame unhealthy lifestyle choices. The fatherhood journey isn’t a short one and being healthy is important.

Accept all offers to babysit

If you don’t have anything going on with your life, have a good sit-down with your kid and teach them a thing or two.

However, you may want to go on a road trip with your friends or take a walk. By accepting babysitting offer, you get a chance to offload fatigue which makes it easier for both of you as parents.

You can catch up and take stock of your relationship over a dinner as friends or relatives take care of the kid.

Embark on household chores

We all feel lazy to do household chores as they are a bit annoying. However, we are no longer in the 19th century where men used to sit down smoking cigar all day leaving all the house chores to the wife.

For heaven’s sake, she just came out from maternity and deserves to rest. For that reason, you can help your wife by deciding to do all the chores….from laundry to washing the dishes.

Doing this makes your first week and more to come as a dad easier to handle.

Final remarks

Being a dad isn’t supposed to be hectic. It’s supposed to be a celebrating period for bringing a new life into the world. With the above tips, your new journey as a dad won’t be bombarded by stress and nervousness.

Dan Chabert, new dad, fatherhood, guest post

About the Author:

Dan Chabert – Writing from Copenhagen, Denmark, Dan is an entrepreneur, husband and ultramarathon distance runner. He spends most of his time co-managing home sites like That Sweet Gift, Borncute, Motorful and Contractorculture, health sites such as Runnerclick, Nicer Shoes and The Gear Hunt. He has also been featured on runner blogs all over the world.

Going Healthy

4 Great Reasons Why You Should Have Regular Dental Check-ups

04/16/2018 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

dental, cleaning, doctors

Most people think that if they brush and floss their teeth daily, then everything should be OK. However, this is not the case and regular visits to your dentist are required to keep your teeth in optimal shape. You should try to go see your dentist at least twice a year, to let him or her check for decay and plaque, and if necessary, remove it for you. Keeping your teeth clean and healthy protects you from further infections and a clean mouth is the key to good health. Make sure to search for a top dentist in your area to ensure a comfortable visit with a caring and knowledgeable staff.

In the past, the dentist was there to administer fillings and pull out rotten teeth if necessary, but now dentists are taking a more preventative approach, where they try to catch issues before they become problems. You may say that you are just too busy to visit a dentist Noosa locals go to, but going to visit your dentist means that you don’t have major problems further down the road. There are many reasons why regular dental checkups are essential and we will look at some of them here.

1. Poor Gums – Gum disease in Australia, and even in other countries around the world, is an ongoing problem. Just because you brush your teeth regularly doesn’t mean that you can avoid gum disease. When you go to see your dentist at your regular times, they will look for any changes in the structure of your gums. They will look for any large spaces between your teeth and your gums because this is a sure sign of gum disease. Poor gums can actually affect the rest of your body and lead to ill health.

2. Prevention Is The Key – Many of us already have cavities in our teeth, but because we feel no pain, we wrongly believe that everything is OK. The cavity may be hidden between your teeth and may not be in a prominent place where you chew, and so you feel nothing. Your dentist’s job and the purpose of your twice annual check up is to find these cavities in their early stage. This way, it can be treated early and with the minimum of fuss.

3. Well Equipped – Even though we brush well and we brush regularly, we never get everything totally cleaned. Plaque can build up behind the teeth in places that are hard to reach with the toothbrush. If the plaque continues to accumulate, it will create tartar and this will certainly lead to bad gum disease and most likely cavities. Your dentist has all the tools necessary to clear away the plaque and the tartar.

4. Early Discovery – When you attend the dentist, they just don’t look at your teeth and gums, they also look at other areas like your throat and tongue, to try to spot other potential issues with your health. If you get early treatment with some oral cancers that are spotted earlier, there is a better chance that treatment can address them.

Dental health checkups are an essential part of your dental routine and should always be undertaken twice yearly. Healthy teeth means healthy gums and a more confident smile.

Parenting

Tips for Diffusing Temper Tantrums in Children

04/14/2018 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

parenting, kids, advice

A temper tantrum is very much a nightmare scenario for any novice parent, and one must resist the temptation to become emotional in one’s response. Nothing is more embarrassing than having to drag your screaming infant away from the chocolate shelves in the supermarket, especially when the toddler makes a stand halfway and stomps their feet and literally screams at the top of their voice! Rather than waiting until it happens, you should spend some time understanding what causes such an eruption of emotion as this is the key to prevention, which is much better than having to deal with the real thing.

Take a Good Look At Your Behaviour

This takes some courage, and there’s a very fine line between giving your child nice things and pampering to their every whim, and with so much love, it can be difficult to say no, and once you realize that the child is actually fully aware of what they are doing when they tantrum like crazy, things start to look a little clearer. Answer this question, when your child gets emotional because they cannot have what they want, what is the eventual outcome? In nine times out of ten, the child gets what he or she wants, which only goes to reinforce the emotional reaction, and this will never recede until the child understands that this method no longer works. Yes, it is a mind game, and if you are not careful, your three year old will have you at their beck and call, and once you reach that stage, it becomes much harder to facilitate change, and if you have ever witnessed what a spoiled 13-year old girl can do when confronted with refusal, you will know how it can end up.

Start As You Mean To Go On

You have obviously heard the saying, “you sometimes have to be cruel to be kind”, and this applies to dealing with a toddler’s demands. Any young human being is constantly testing the waters, as they become more and more familiar with their environment, and if mum is constant with her response to needs, the child will accept this unconditionally, and it is only when mum shows a chink in her armor, that the emotional response emerges which is a natural way to try to ensure you do get what it is you want. You obviously want the day care center to have the same policy. If you happen to live in Australia, there are qualified Melbourne child care providers who will ensure that your child is not given everything they want in order to keep them quiet. The professional carer will simply engage the child in something interesting, which takes their focus away, and the results are impressive: Tantrum stopped in its tracks!

Calmness Rules

If your child is red lining on the tantrum scale, simply remain calm and expressionless, and sooner or later, the child will realize that letting off such steam is very tiring, and as the expected response is not forthcoming, they will eventually call it a day. Any emotional response to a tantrum is like throwing a can of gasoline over a fire, and with the absence of this, the fire will eventually run out of fuel and calmness will return – with a little sobbing afterwards – and as terrible as this might sound, do NOT hug your child as they are sobbing in defeat as they will take that as a victory and it will be stored in the memory for future use. If you would like to read what the experts say about how to deal with a temper tantrum, there is a link to an informative article.

Mum and dad need to be firm, and above all, consistent in their response to toddler requests, and like it or not, saying no is often the right thing to do.