Hobbies are essential for a healthy child’s development. They teach your kids a special skill – whether it be sport-based, musical, or creative. On top of this, they learn key social, emotional, and developmental skills.
But, as with all children, your child will likely at some point ask to quit. It shouldn’t be a surprise; children are, by nature, changeable.
When your kid asks to give up their hobby, you as a parent are faced with a difficult choice: do you let them quit, or do you force them to stay? It can be difficult to tell your child no, but often keeping going with a hobby is the best thing for your child.
But why is it better to encourage your children to stick with their hobbies, and how can you convince them not to give it up?
What are the benefits of sticking with a hobby?
Hobbies are great in several ways – but what are the specific benefits of sticking with a hobby, even if your kids want to move on from it?
Develop their skills: If your child gives up on a hobby, they won’t get to progress their skills. For example, if they stop piano lessons at grade two, they’ll never get to grade three or four. Pursuing hobbies, even when it’s difficult, will give your children valuable skills they can carry with them through life.
Create opportunities: Following on from the last point, by developing skills in these areas, you open up more opportunities for your children. If they become highly skilled in a particular area, this could become a career path for them later down the line. In the short term, smaller opportunities will be created, like the opportunity to meet new friends and have exciting experiences, such as visiting another town to play a football match.
Develop their characters: Sticking with things, even when they’re hard, develops your children as people. They are more likely to grow up into teenagers and adults who can deal with hard situations. They will learn that, sometimes, you have to go through a hard patch to get to the good again. These are essential life lessons that your child can learn in a safe environment before they need the skills for harder situations.
How do you encourage your children to stick with their hobbies?
So, you’ve established that you want your child to stick with their hobby. But how can you convince them this is for the best? When it comes down to it, the best way to encourage them is to support them – in whatever form this comes. Show enthusiasm for their interests: Your kids look up to you. If you show interest in their hobbies, they are more likely to want to pursue them. This enthusiasm will look different depending on the hobby, but in whatever form you can, engage with their hobby. For example, go and watch their tennis match, or buy a ticket to see their theatre show.
Support any equipment needs: Another way to support your children in their hobbies is to help them with any equipment they need. For example, if they are feeling bad about their hobby, why not take them out to try some new kit, or, in the case of musicians, look at different hearing protection for musicians – this way, you show your child that you care about them and their hobbies and that they should too.
Talk to them about their hobbies: By talking to them about their hobbies, you can create a positive feeling in your children towards the thing they find difficult. Use positive language to convince them around to thinking their hobby is a pleasant thing. Tell them how proud you are of them for sticking with it, and hopefully, they’ll come around to feeling proud of it too.
Know when to let them quit.
In the same way you should encourage your kids to stick with their hobbies, you should also know when to let them quit. When a kid is forced to do something they hate – for whatever reason – it can leave long-term damaging effects. Both in terms of their relationship to the hobby, and sometimes in the worst case, in terms of their relationship to you as their parent.
When your kid asks to quit their hobby, consider these factors to determine whether they should be allowed to quit.
Listen: More important than anything, you need to listen to your child. Get them to explain why they want to leave the club or activity, and given their response, make a decision. Ensure that you listen properly – active listening, not passive – to ensure you understand their thoughts and feelings properly.
Impulse: Does your child want to quit on impulse? If the desire to quit seems to have come out of nowhere or has clearly been triggered by one moment, quitting probably isn’t the answer. Instead, talk through with them why they’ve come to this decision and find ways to solve the short-term problem that doesn’t involve quitting their hobbies.
However, if they have persistently asked to quit for a long time – and if they can give solid reasons for why they don’t want to continue – then it may be best to let them leave. There are always other hobbies – maybe you’ll only be able to find your child’s new favorite hobby by leaving the one that they clearly don’t like anymore.
Persistence: Persistence and hard work are two great skills to instill in your child. The hobby may feel difficult for your child, but going through this period of struggle can be a great learning opportunity for your child, so insisting that they can continue can sometimes be for the best.
Listen, listen, listen!
As a parent, it is your job to look after your kids. But your kids are very smart too. The best way to make this decision is to listen to them well, to gather all the facts you need. Remember to be kind and change your mind later if you think you’ve made the wrong decision.