A temper tantrum is very much a nightmare scenario for any novice parent, and one must resist the temptation to become emotional in one’s response. Nothing is more embarrassing than having to drag your screaming infant away from the chocolate shelves in the supermarket, especially when the toddler makes a stand halfway and stomps their feet and literally screams at the top of their voice! Rather than waiting until it happens, you should spend some time understanding what causes such an eruption of emotion as this is the key to prevention, which is much better than having to deal with the real thing.
Take a Good Look At Your Behaviour
This takes some courage, and there’s a very fine line between giving your child nice things and pampering to their every whim, and with so much love, it can be difficult to say no, and once you realize that the child is actually fully aware of what they are doing when they tantrum like crazy, things start to look a little clearer. Answer this question, when your child gets emotional because they cannot have what they want, what is the eventual outcome? In nine times out of ten, the child gets what he or she wants, which only goes to reinforce the emotional reaction, and this will never recede until the child understands that this method no longer works. Yes, it is a mind game, and if you are not careful, your three year old will have you at their beck and call, and once you reach that stage, it becomes much harder to facilitate change, and if you have ever witnessed what a spoiled 13-year old girl can do when confronted with refusal, you will know how it can end up.
Start As You Mean To Go On
You have obviously heard the saying, “you sometimes have to be cruel to be kind”, and this applies to dealing with a toddler’s demands. Any young human being is constantly testing the waters, as they become more and more familiar with their environment, and if mum is constant with her response to needs, the child will accept this unconditionally, and it is only when mum shows a chink in her armor, that the emotional response emerges which is a natural way to try to ensure you do get what it is you want. You obviously want the day care center to have the same policy. If you happen to live in Australia, there are qualified Melbourne child care providers who will ensure that your child is not given everything they want in order to keep them quiet. The professional carer will simply engage the child in something interesting, which takes their focus away, and the results are impressive: Tantrum stopped in its tracks!
Calmness Rules
If your child is red lining on the tantrum scale, simply remain calm and expressionless, and sooner or later, the child will realize that letting off such steam is very tiring, and as the expected response is not forthcoming, they will eventually call it a day. Any emotional response to a tantrum is like throwing a can of gasoline over a fire, and with the absence of this, the fire will eventually run out of fuel and calmness will return – with a little sobbing afterwards – and as terrible as this might sound, do NOT hug your child as they are sobbing in defeat as they will take that as a victory and it will be stored in the memory for future use. If you would like to read what the experts say about how to deal with a temper tantrum, there is a link to an informative article.
Mum and dad need to be firm, and above all, consistent in their response to toddler requests, and like it or not, saying no is often the right thing to do.
