Why (and How) Dads Should Spend Time Alone with Their Kids

02/06/2020 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

Food on the table. A roof over their heads. Education from the best schools. Money for their other needs.

What does it mean to be a good father? For many men, they equate that role with being a good provider. While there is certainly nothing wrong with providing for the needs of your children, the truth is that it is just a fraction of what fatherhood is really about.

Times are a-changin’

Traditionally, dads have taken the role of the provider or breadwinner while moms tended to their kids and homes. For many dads, that can mean having little time to spend with their kids.

But with the changing times and the evolution of cultures, more and more dads are now beginning to spend more quality time with their young ones. Compared to 50 years ago, dads have tripled the time they spend with their kids.

Why spend more time with your kids

Numerous studies indicate that spending more time together benefits both dads and their kids. What are these benefits?

Kids perform well in school

When a father takes a paternity leave to take care of his little one, his child is more likely to do well in school later on. And when a dad spends more time helping his child with schoolwork, his chances of becoming successful inside the class increases exponentially.

Kids develop positive traits

Masculinity has been associated with many positive characteristics, like confidence, assertiveness, and loyalty. But on the flip side, these same traits, when taken to the extreme, can lead to qualities associated with toxic masculinity. These include lack of empathy, aggression, and detachment.

When dads spend more time at home, they provide their kids, especially boys, with a positive role model to pattern their behavior after. The result? Boys who are open and emotionally present.

Happier couples

Apart from the kids, both moms and dads also benefit from the increased time that fathers spend with their children.

When a father spends more time at home, not just to play with the kids, he becomes more aware of the things involved in raising his children. Tracking appointments with doctors and school activities as well as tending to the house all take a mental toll on moms.

If you spend more time at home, you’ll be able to share and unburden your spouse of this mental stress. In turn, you develop an equal partnership that strengthens your relationship.

Spending quality time with the kids

Most fathers get the opportunity to spend time with their children after coming home from work and during the weekends. If you have never been alone with your kids, this may seem like a daunting idea.

Part of that fear stems from the fact that these interactions are usually done in the presence of your wife. Plus, your mind may be swirling with several questions. These are perfectly natural.

If you wish to overcome these fears and ensure that you have a good time with the kids, whether you’re just staying at home to play video games or you’re planning to visit a park, here are a few essential things to remember.

Don’t hesitate to ask questions

You might think that you know your kids well, but your wife probably knows their quirks better. From their favorite foods to their preferred clothes, don’t hesitate to ask your wife things that you might not know about your kids yet. And don’t commit things to memory; write everything down instead.

Let your kids be your focus

If you rarely spend quality time with the kids, every second that you spend with them should be sacred and respected. That simply means that you should be physically and mentally present. Turn your gadgets off before entering the kids’ play area with the young ones.

Momentarily forget about your commitments at work or the upcoming football match that you had been raring to see and focus your attention on the activities that you have planned to do with your little ones.

Plan your day around your kids’ personal rhythms

Kids, especially toddlers, have their own rhythms. As much as possible, you should plan your day with them around that rhythm.

For example, if you are heading out somewhere, make sure that you do so after they have been fed and have had their naps. This will help ensure that your kids won’t make a fuss and you will be able to maximize your enjoyment of the time spent with them.

Let your wife have her “me time”

Spending time alone with your kids will give you a better perspective of the things that your spouse does to keep the household in good order while taking care of the children.

While you are taking care of the kids, allow your wife to have the opportunity to do the things that she wants, whether she needs a well-deserved trip to the salon or spa or she wants to simply catch up on her favorite series on Netflix.

The clock is ticking

Your kids will only be young once. Soon, they’ll be making friends and would rather spend time with them. Take advantage of their youth and spend as much time with them as you possibly can, whether that means buying kids’ play area tickets for some fun bonding time this weekend or spending a lazy afternoon together at home.

Life, Parenting

Need Time To Yourself In A Busy House? Make A “Dad Cave!”

02/06/2020 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

dad cave, man cave, fatherhood, personal time, rest, relaxation, parenting — Pexels – CC0 Licence

Sometimes when we spend quality time with our children we might think that we just need a little moment to ourselves. If we watch TV with our kids and it’s yet another episode of Teen Titans or something that we cannot comprehend we may need a little time to ourselves. When we don’t have a physical space in our home but now the opportunity is coming to renovate the junk room, setting up a “dad cave” might not be the most popular option in the household but if you’re setting up a room for everyone is there something you can do to get some sort of cave for your needs?

Mix Up The Styles

It could very well be the fact that this spare room has to become an office or somewhere for the kids to play away from the living room, but that doesn’t mean you can’t incorporate something that’s for you! There’s plenty of whiskey decor or colorful pictures that can provide a little bit of your own personality. By taking the opportunity to allocate a little area of this room that’s for you means that when you come to use that space all by yourself you can feel a little bit more comfortable.

Adding Some Creature Comforts

You can put things in there that will please everyone. Not everybody has the luxury of a spare room so there will be a lot of debate as to what will go in there. Crowd pleasers are the usual items of furniture like couches. But if there’s not enough room for a long couch you can set up an armchair and a footstool so you can take the opportunity to relax. You also need to think about lighting. Making the place nice and bright will help if you are doubling the space up as a home office. Installing a dimmer switch gives you the opportunity to create mood lighting so you can turn this space into whatever you want.

Renovating The Basement Or Garage

If you really feel like you need to have some sort of dad cave you might want to think about renovating the garage or the basement because they are not particularly popular rooms. You can make plenty of space in your garage by utilizing Slatwall Systems to get most of your items off the floor and neatly hanging up. A garage can be cold in the middle of winter and a basement might not be easily accessible. This gives you plenty of scope to make it a bit more to your style. Renovating these spaces can be a bit more expensive, especially if you want to install insulation, but with somewhere like the basement you’ve got more scope to put things in there that don’t suit the rest of the house. For example, if you wanted to put in a pool table or a space for your hundreds of video games, this is the perfect chance! But make sure that both spaces are safe first.

Dad caves are few and far between, primarily because they end up being taken over by the rest of the family. Compromise is the name of the game but if you want to set up somewhere that feels like your space you can always try these options.

Going Healthy, Health, Life, Lifestyle

15 Ways To Reduce Ageing

02/05/2020 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

ageing, health, getting old, youth, life — pexels

Time will take its toll eventually but there are ways you can keep it at bay. There are simple things you can do in order to look after yourself a bit better, which aren’t costly or time consuming. You will instantly feel fresher and more confident if you follow these twenty simple tips.

1. Keep out of the sun

Consider using a fake tan or getting a spray on instead of spending hours cooking yourself. Not only will this accelerate your skin ageing but it will also greatly increase your chances of getting skin cancer. Steer clear of sunbeds. Make sure you use plenty of sunscreen when you know you’re going to be out in the sun. It’s recommendable to apply sunscreen on your face as part of your morning routine, or if not use a good moisturizer with a high SPF.

2. Moisturize

Apply moisturizer at least twice a day. After your morning shower and at night before bed. You’ll notice an immediate reduction in dryness. Moisturizer makes your skin more supple and protects it against many things you face during the day, such as pollution and smog. You will find that there are different types for each skin type, normal, oil, dry or combination. Combination skin is an unfortunate combination of both dry and greasy, which often makes it very sensitive, so choose a moisturizer specially designed for sensitive skin.

3. Rest

Get your beauty sleep, literally. Sleep at least eight hours a night and make sure you find ways to combat stress. Maintaining a healthy routine, balancing work, leisure, exercise and rest is the most important thing you can do for your health in general.

4. Things to avoid

Reduce your intake of caffeine and alcohol. Try to spread your alcohol consumption over a few days in the week and have the rest of the days off. Try to drink a maximum of four cups of coffee per day. If you smoke, consider giving up. It has a proven effect on ageing and other health risks. If you need help to finally quit click here.

Be aware of how much sugar you consume. This won’t help you to look younger or stay in good shape. Stick to food without artificial sweeteners, look for natural ingredients.

5. Take care of your teeth

Brush your teeth twice a day and use a whitening toothpaste. Go to the dentist once per year and keep on top of it. It might seem like an unnecessary expense but it’ll save your money in the long run, a healthy smile can take years off you and really brighten up your face.

6. Watch your weight

Maintaining a healthy routine will help to reduce ageing in different ways. Ensure that you get enough exercise. The unhealthier you are, the more you will increase the effect of ageing. If you can maintain your weight to a healthy BMI you will appear younger and more energetic.

7. Combat hair loss

This is a genetic occurrence but there are some natural ways you can delay the process. There are many natural products you can use in order to improve the situation. CBD helps with hair loss, for example, and it has many other health benefits, such as helping you to relax and pain relief.

8. Omega 3

Remember to include plenty of omega 3 in your diet. Foods which are high in omega 3 include salmon and oily fish, nuts and seeds, plant oils such as flaxseed oil, soybean oil and canola oil, but also fortified foods such as some brands of yogurt, eggs, juices, milks and soy beverages.

9. Stay hydrated

Drink at least 4 pints of water per day. Top up your moisturizer, including body lotion. Keep a reusable bottle of water with you at all times to remind you. There are many environmentally friendly options available to buy online.

10. Improve your mood

This doesn’t seem like it would work but always believe in mind over matter. The better you feel the more radiant you will look. Try different ways to improve your mental well-being. Spend more time with your friends and family, take up a new hobby, or go for a walk or even take a trip alone. It can be healthy to make some time for yourself occasionally, even go out to the movies alone, or to dinner.

11. Facial regime

This doesn’t need to be a trip to the spa. Simply have a routine in which you wash your every morning and evening. Thoroughly wash your face, you can purchase a cleansing solution, or simply use a gentle soap and warm water. After washing your face be sure to apply your trusty moisturizer. For the evening consider investing in night cream, as this does all the work for you while you sleep.

12. Antioxidants

There are many ways you can include antioxidants in your diet. These can include more dark chocolate, red wine, tea, and certain vegetables and berries. These help your body protect itself from many diseases by eliminating chemicals called “free radicals” which are harmful to your cells.

13. Eye creams

As well as moisturizing, try using an eye cream before bed as well. Your eyes can be a tell-tale sign of your age, mainly because they show your emotions and energy levels immediately. Try to keep your eyes refreshed with a number of suggestions here.

14. Exfoliate

This should also be part of your skin care regime. It helps to remove dead skin cells and any blackheads. It will give you an instant face lift. You can buy an exfoliator for next to nothing at your local supermarket.

15. Take a trip

Getting away from it all is the best way you can fully rejuvenate yourself over the weekend. Even consider taking yourself on a minibreak. Go and investigate one of the local hiking or cycling trails, try to get in touch with nature. Your coworkers will notice the difference when you get back on Monday.